Physical fitness is important to me because I’ve witnessed the effects of a sedentary life. Physical decline seems to spiral into mental and emotional decline. And I’ve observed what it looks like when you let life happen instead of moving through it with purpose, a sense of adventure, and self-care. But, I’ve also seen what aging can look like if you continue to 1. move your body and 2. nurture your body. It adds quality years to your life. I want that!

I have students up to 80 years old; some of whom are doing advanced Pilates work! It’s no surprise that they also also have active lives.

I know I’m under the heavy influence of Joseph Pilates but I’ve gotta agree with his statement that “Physical fitness is the first requisite of happiness”. My fitness level is so deeply tied to my emotional state because, without my health and mobility, I couldn’t do the things that I love with “zest and pleasure” (also Joe’s words). I’m a mover by nature. A dancer. An aerialist. A performer. A Pilates practitioner. And, anyone that knows me, knows that I’ve still got super-hero aspirations. Call it mid-life crisis. I call it optimism.

In 10 years I’ll be 62 and I want my body to feel like a goddamn superhero! But that’s been my goal since I was 10 years old. I never wanna give up that dream or aspirational mindset because it keeps me active. And it motivates me to prioritize movement, even on days when sloth feels like the preferred option.

My super-hero fantasies, although child-like, motivate me to push myself toward even greater pain-free mobility. This is why Pilates is my jam! It’s not designed for status quo mentality. It’s designed for people like me who want to keep getting stronger, more flexible, more agile and more powerful.

Physical signs of aging make me feel like time is of the essence. They remind me that life is not infinite, and so I should avoid spending it on the couch scrolling social media, binging Netflix or simply dreaming about all of the things on my bucket list. I want to be in the present moment and savor whatever makes me come alive. I mean, there’s still so much I want to see, do, and experience in this lifetime.

The aging process also makes me curious and, honestly, a lil’ nervous about how the next few decades will alter my appearance. This quote about aging from Joseph Pilates always cracks me up: “As we mature, we find ourselves living in bodies not always complimentary to our ego”.

Something that reinforces my negative body image is the loop of negative memories I hold onto. They’re always on standby for any moment that might trigger self-loathing. When that happens, my brain – on auto-pilot – hits “play”; and once that loop gets going, the pause button is hard to access. I am my own worst enemy.

Compounding that is the fact that, as a dancer, I spent my most formative years having my weight and body type scrutinized and criticized. And that bled into my professional dance career.

To me, “body confidence” is… owning my strength, power, & resilience as much as I embrace my vulnerability, softness, sensuality. It’s feeling curious and inspired by my body’s potential, adaptability, and mobility. It’s celebrating its ability to explore the world through my senses, learn new skills, and constantly regenerate through nurturing lifestyle habits. It’s gratitude for my body’s intuitive abilities to facilitate  empowerment and healing in others through Pilates and massage therapy.