relationships

An intangible gift that I like giving is…

An intangible gift that I like giving is best expressed by Maya Angelou, “people… will never forget the way you made them feel”. That resonates so deeply because, even through time and forgiveness, I still feel the sting of other people’s words or the weight of their behaviors and betrayals. And it’s taken so much effort to rebuild my self-esteem, dare to be vulnerable and to trust my intuition again. So it’s important to me that I’m really conscious about how I move through relationships and shared spaces. 

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A life lesson I learned in 2022 is…

A life lesson I learned in 2022 is that “the hustle” is overrated while inner-peace is underrated. What’s important to me now is the quality of my life and the quantity of my joy. Financial success is a definite priority for me so that I can afford the lifestyle and experiences I want. But I’ve realized that if I’m so engaged in the pursuit of money that I don’t have time to experience my life, what’s the point? 

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In my relationships I’m saying “no” to…

In my relationships I’m saying “no” to red flags. But, like, really this time! Yes, I’ll continue to listen with an open mind and trust with an open heart. But, from now on, I’ll for damn sure observe someone’s actions for their truth and trust my intuition. Someone’s “potential” ain’t enough for me anymore. I’m keeping a close eye on character, habits, behaviors and lifestyle. What they value. How they treat people. How they manage conflict or handle stress.

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When someone tells me “no” I feel…

When someone tells me “no” my first reaction is to get all up in my feelings. Yep, I feel disappointed, butt-hurt and wonder “How could they possibly say “no” to ME!?” And then I do the psychological dance in my head which looks like a technicolor play-by-play of our most recent interactions to understand what I could’ve done to elicit a “no”. It’s crazy how a simple “no” can feel like a personal attack that sends me spiraling.

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S.I.T. Day 27: The Kinda People I Dig

I’m focusing on relationships that feel authentic and expansive. The kinda relationships where we can show up 100% ourselves and still feel loved. Fabulous or messy. Winning or losing. We lean in, listen, support and encourage each other through the best and worst of times. We know the backstories of each other’s lives. The ones that shape our opinions, beliefs, and choices. Compassion and understanding live here. We respect our differences, and have fun exchanging our own unique perspectives on just about any topic under the sun. Our relationship is uncensored but respectful, full of forgiveness (when needed) and love.

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S.I.T. Day 19: Savoring Choices, Successes, & Memories

I will forever savor the power of choice and independent thinking that freed me from a life that felt small and inauthentic. And the depth of wisdom I’ve gained from ignored intuition, poor choices, and failed relationships. I’ll also savor friendships, old and new, that are based upon mutual love, compassion, truth, and respect. The friends who will pull me out of perpetual work-mode and force me into play-mode, only to remember “Oh yeah, I used to be fun!”. The friends who call me out when a sista needs to be checked, who listen when I need to be heard, and hold me up when I need to be supported.

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